Everything is so bitter sweet

My friend Ness' husband is home on R&R. What a wonderful opportunity to get a break from the stress of a deployment for him and his family. However, I've been through R&R during a one year deployment. Those few weeks that you get to see your loved one is the best thing in the world. That one last hug, that one last kiss....... that one last look into their eyes.

It's all drowned in a cloud of knowing. Knowing that in just a few short days it's all going to come to an end again and you'll go through a painful goodbye, once again. Everyday they are home, you dread the day that approaches, all too fast, when they have to leave again.

J is due back from his deployment in just 8 weeks, about 60 days. I can do two months standing on my head, holding both kids. But I know the day he comes home will be bittersweet. You are so amazingly over the moon to see your loved one again, safe on our soil. What you also know, in the back of your mind, is that it wont be your last homecoming. That in the months to come, you'll be saying goodbye, again. I know that in November of next year, my DH could deploy yet again. I know without a doubt that if he is still in the military he will deploy again in the next two years. I know I'll having to say goodbye, yet again.

What do you do when you know you'll have to go through a long, terrifying deployment again?? Take it one day at a time and enjoy every single day you have with them. You try not to take things for granted. We can be in the middle of a giant fight, even when he's deployed, and we still say 'I love you' every time we end a phone call or chat. I know it may be the last time I get to say it and if nothing else, he wont ever have a doubt in his mind how I feel about him.

Even though it is bittersweet, I would give ANYTHING for my husband to have R&R (he doesn't get to come home on a 'break' and I haven't seen him since early March). It may be painful knowing that he has to leave again in a few short days, but those you have together are simply amazing.

'Welcome'

Ok, for those of you who don't know me.......... here's the 'back ground'.

Meeting my husband:
I was getting ready to go into the Air Force and turn 21. I was planning a big 21st. birthday bash. A friend of mine 'Denny' (I met while working security years prior) wanted to come up and celebrate with me. He was stationed at Warner Robins AFB, in GA. He came up, the night went great. We bar hoped and landed at a strip club in central WI (where I lived at the time). At bar time (2am WI time, so 3am GA time) we left. My cousin L was our DD, Denny and I were drunk. Denny was in the back seat, my upfront. Denny was feeling up my cousin from the back seat (lol and ewww all at the same time). I stole Denny's phone and said 'lets call a friend of yours' (who doesn't love drunk dialing at 3am?!?!). He told me he didn't have any friends. I scrolled through his phone saying 'everyone has friends' and landed on James. Denny said 'he's pretty cute.' So I gave him a call. This guy picked up the other end!! It was 3 in the freakin' morning on a Friday!! He had just gotten off work and answered the phone because he knew Denny was going up to 'some girl's' birthday party and he thought Denny had gotten arrested (seriously?? Denny was really lame and quiet... he'd never get arrested, EVER). Well, we chatted (yes, me being drunk) until 6am. He gave me his number and told me to call him the next day (so Friday) when I sobered up, if I even remembered. Well, I did. I had to take L to the hospital for an out patient thing and while I was waiting for her to get out, I called him.... and he answered again!!

I had some vacation time coming up (I worked a very high stress job and you could only work so many days a week, but that's another story). He told me I should come down there for a visit. Less than 2 weeks later I was on a plane to Georgia.

I stayed in GA for 2 weeks and we got on great. We had soooooo much fun. Actually, I almost got him arrested my first night on base (again, another story). James asked me if I would move to GA to be with him. I flew home on a Friday, packed my bags on Saturday, and was back in GA by Sunday. My family was pretty upset about it, but so it goes.

We were married just a month later on December 21, 2004. It was VERY fast, as I soon learned most military relationships are. I wonder if that's why the divorce rate is so high??

Just a few weeks later in January of 2006, James deployed to Iraq.......... and that leads into another story "Honey, I'm deploying to Iraq"