J called me at 3:30pm yesterday. He said 'they want me to go to Iraq. I leave in 3 weeks'
J went to Iraq in 2003. He went again in 2005. He went to Korea in 2006. Now he can add another Iraq ''notch'' for 2009.
A guy that was supposed to go on the deployment is being kicked out of the military for being a fat lazy a$$. He failed his fitness test FOUR times (so for like a year he couldn't pass). Because 'fatty' is being kicked out of the military, they HAD to fill his spot. It was either J or another guy who JUST got up here like 3 weeks ago. It wouldn't be fair for that other guy to go, so J said he'd go.
The cons:
He'll be away from his family
He'll miss seeing his new born son grow (just like he missed K)
He'll be shot at and could get killed (he could also crash his car any day and be killed here I suppose)
I wont get any sex for 8 months
He'll be away from his family
He'll be away from his family
The Pros:
It helps some one else out
We'll make a LITTLE extra money
This *may* help him get the points he needs to get promoted next year
He wont be gone for 12 months!
I get to go home and see my family
I wont be going through it alone (I love you Ness!)
The irony in this, he left at the exact same point in K's life. He left when she was 2.5 months old. He's going to be leaving when B is 2.5 months old. The good new is, he'll be back for B's first birthday and Christmas!! YAY!
He leaves in just a few weeks (on the 5th of March). In May I'm going to head to the midwest with the kiddos (what an adventure that will be!!). He'd going to try to get out processed by the end of the week, and then take 10 days off to be with us.
As it goes in an active duty military wife's life, things are ever changing. Nothing is set in stone, until it's underway it seems. I know the kids and I will have lots of our own adventures, while J will have lots of his own.
He shouldn't have to go to Russia now in Dec., so that's good. We also wont have to extend out our time here in Alaska!! YAY!!
My good friend 'Ness' (you'll hear about her a lot) back in WI, is going to be on almost the EXACT same timeline as us. Her DH (dear hubby) is heading to TX now for training, and then will be going over seas the same time as my DH. It would be nice if our husbands could hook up with each other while over there, but the sandbox is a BIG place. Ness and her 2 gorgeous daughters (we've decided B is going to marry her youngest, A) are going to hopeful come up here towards the end of July/Aug.
So much weighs heavily on a wife's mind when their husbands are deployed. Are they ok, what are they doing, who are they with, what have the seen, will they be ok when the get back?? The burning question on lots of minds, 'is he cheating?' That ladies and gentle men will be touched on often, as it comes up often. Men/women in the military are no more likely to cheat on their spouses than men/women who stay at home every day. I've seen families ripped apart, hide it, drag through it, and get over it. I've seen wives back home cheat and know of men over there that cheat. But I'll dive into that later.
*women over there cheat too (obviously) and men back home cheat too, I'm just phrasing it as it applies to me and most of my friends, as wives at home*
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
I want to be able to hold him........ but he's a world away
I belong to a fertility blog group on a different web page. That group is for military spouses. I think that we've all been through deployments and tried to get pg. before a deployment. There seems to be a rather high amount of husbands currently gone.
One spouse today, "C" says:
"Yeah 2 more months, I can't wait!!! I was sad today though, it just feels like it has been forever! I guess it was because I could see him on the web cam and I just wanted to be able to touch him because he seemed so close. The reality is that he is a world away and it sucks. I'm OK with it most of the time but today was hard."
Her husband is due back in 'just' 2 more months. The end of a deployment can't go fast enough. It always seems to drag on and go so slow. It reminded me of how it feels on those days. I hate, hate, hate, HATE that!! It's just horrible. Often times people can use web cams. You can see them and hear them, but you want so badly to be able to touch them and smell them and feel their arms around you. It is wonderful to see them and talk to them, know that they're ok, but there's a part of you that just yearns to be with them. That never goes away. It's on days like those where the web cam is a bit like pouring salt in the wound.
Sometimes you just have to touch the computer screen and day dream of the days you've spent together, praying you'll get to hold each other in your arms again soon................
One spouse today, "C" says:
"Yeah 2 more months, I can't wait!!! I was sad today though, it just feels like it has been forever! I guess it was because I could see him on the web cam and I just wanted to be able to touch him because he seemed so close. The reality is that he is a world away and it sucks. I'm OK with it most of the time but today was hard."
Her husband is due back in 'just' 2 more months. The end of a deployment can't go fast enough. It always seems to drag on and go so slow. It reminded me of how it feels on those days. I hate, hate, hate, HATE that!! It's just horrible. Often times people can use web cams. You can see them and hear them, but you want so badly to be able to touch them and smell them and feel their arms around you. It is wonderful to see them and talk to them, know that they're ok, but there's a part of you that just yearns to be with them. That never goes away. It's on days like those where the web cam is a bit like pouring salt in the wound.
Sometimes you just have to touch the computer screen and day dream of the days you've spent together, praying you'll get to hold each other in your arms again soon................
I'm going to 12's
J comes home the other night and says they have to start working 12 hour shifts.
They've deployed SO MANY people out of his shop that there's no one left. J is one man deep (as in he's the only one!) in his section, doing a job it takes 3-5 people to do. So he's over stressed as it is, not they have to start working 12 hours on top of it?? The morale in that shop is going to hit rock bottom, and fast.
They keep getting tasked (asked to deploy people). So who is in charge of that? Why doesn't who ever is in charge start to turn them down? Why do they keep saying 'sure, we'll send more people'? I just don't get it. Where's the logic? I'm obviously missing something.
They're getting in some 'newbs' (new guys, fresh out of basic training) over the next 20 days and a few people are PCSing up here.
On an up note J said that they're starting to close down some bases over in the middle east. There really IS going to be a pullout. But do you think the MSM is going to cover it? No, because they'd have to give the Bush admin. credit that the surge worked. Go figure.
They've deployed SO MANY people out of his shop that there's no one left. J is one man deep (as in he's the only one!) in his section, doing a job it takes 3-5 people to do. So he's over stressed as it is, not they have to start working 12 hours on top of it?? The morale in that shop is going to hit rock bottom, and fast.
They keep getting tasked (asked to deploy people). So who is in charge of that? Why doesn't who ever is in charge start to turn them down? Why do they keep saying 'sure, we'll send more people'? I just don't get it. Where's the logic? I'm obviously missing something.
They're getting in some 'newbs' (new guys, fresh out of basic training) over the next 20 days and a few people are PCSing up here.
On an up note J said that they're starting to close down some bases over in the middle east. There really IS going to be a pullout. But do you think the MSM is going to cover it? No, because they'd have to give the Bush admin. credit that the surge worked. Go figure.
Call 911!!!
I will start by saying that I am happy to be alive an thankful to have my family. When I bought the house the ONLY demand I made was that they went out and bought a new CO detector for the second floor. I've never even known any one that had a problem, but it was just something I was being OCD about.
Sunday night we were supposed to ALL go out with some friends. James was being a jerk and I told him to stay home so I didn't have to deal with him and my mom and Kayla decided to stay too. So I took Ben and went out with some friends for dinner.
I got home at 9:30pm and James was still up. He wanted to apologize for being such an asshat. So he stayed up (normally he's asleep by 8:30 because he has to get up at 4:30) with me for a bit to talk. We were sharing a glass of milk, joking around, when an 'alarm' went off (10:30pm). We have HUGE, tall vaulted ceilings (so it echos in here) and thought it was the fire alarm at the top. I ran Ben into our bedroom so that his ears weren't hurting and James went to get the ladder. We couldn't figure out why it was going off since there was no smoke. I called my mom up to take Ben, while I helped James. He pulls if off the ceiling and is like 'this isn't going off'. We realized it was the carbon monoxide detector over by the fireplace. It's an older one so I figured the battery was dead or the sensor was 'dirty' and needed to air out. We put in a new battery and tried to air it out. It stopped after we had it outside for a min (and the door open off the family room, to the balcony).
We go sit back down and relax when the alarm in my daughters room goes off. I freak out and yell at James to go get her and get her outside NOW! I yell at my mom to get Ben outside right away. She was like 'why?' I just yelled at her again to get him out of the house. She wrapped him up in a blanket and headed to the door.
James got K and carried her outside. I called 911 (10:41pm) and gathered up blankets (it was -4 out that night) for in the vehicle. I get outside and we wait for the FD to get there. It's a volunteer dept. so it took them like 20 min. (thank God it wasn't burning down!). I notice a headache, but think it's just stress related.... after all, it's probably just faulty alarms, batteries, something.
A firefighter shows up with a special machine and James and him go inside w/o masks (idiots) to check it out. They're in there for a while and I got worried and texted James to see if everything was ok. He said no, there are 'elevated' levels in the house and 'calling back up'. Then another truck shows up and a bunch of guys get out in all their gear/masks, ect. They go in the house and are in there forever.
Finally I'm told that it's coming from the furnace... this gas was coming through ALL of the vents in the house!! Thank God we had a second alarm in Kayla's room. The first one did start going off again about 20 min. later (we'd had the door open and it cleared out a lot of the gas in the family room), but her room would have just been filling with gas that entire time.
At like 1:00 I tell James I'm going to leave and take the kids to a hotel since they were both tired and needed to go to sleep. We got to the hotel and all tucked into bed about 2am. It was just a really, really long night.
So we've had a ton of service guys out Monday, it still isn't 'fixed' per say. There's no more gas leak, but it will happen again. Turns out Carrier had a recall on their heat exchange things (can't remember the part name), but it isn't public or on their website!! These jerks could have killed my entire family, because they aren't 'vocal' about the recall on a part of theirs! So now I have to contact them and bitch about it. *sigh*
We still had a hotel room for Monday night and are home for good now. I had to go out and get a special detector that gives you the exact read out of carbon monoxide levels in the house and plug it in where Ben sleeps.
Make sure you guys all have detectors!!! I don't know what I would have done if I had lost my daughter or any one else
Sunday night we were supposed to ALL go out with some friends. James was being a jerk and I told him to stay home so I didn't have to deal with him and my mom and Kayla decided to stay too. So I took Ben and went out with some friends for dinner.
I got home at 9:30pm and James was still up. He wanted to apologize for being such an asshat. So he stayed up (normally he's asleep by 8:30 because he has to get up at 4:30) with me for a bit to talk. We were sharing a glass of milk, joking around, when an 'alarm' went off (10:30pm). We have HUGE, tall vaulted ceilings (so it echos in here) and thought it was the fire alarm at the top. I ran Ben into our bedroom so that his ears weren't hurting and James went to get the ladder. We couldn't figure out why it was going off since there was no smoke. I called my mom up to take Ben, while I helped James. He pulls if off the ceiling and is like 'this isn't going off'. We realized it was the carbon monoxide detector over by the fireplace. It's an older one so I figured the battery was dead or the sensor was 'dirty' and needed to air out. We put in a new battery and tried to air it out. It stopped after we had it outside for a min (and the door open off the family room, to the balcony).
We go sit back down and relax when the alarm in my daughters room goes off. I freak out and yell at James to go get her and get her outside NOW! I yell at my mom to get Ben outside right away. She was like 'why?' I just yelled at her again to get him out of the house. She wrapped him up in a blanket and headed to the door.
James got K and carried her outside. I called 911 (10:41pm) and gathered up blankets (it was -4 out that night) for in the vehicle. I get outside and we wait for the FD to get there. It's a volunteer dept. so it took them like 20 min. (thank God it wasn't burning down!). I notice a headache, but think it's just stress related.... after all, it's probably just faulty alarms, batteries, something.
A firefighter shows up with a special machine and James and him go inside w/o masks (idiots) to check it out. They're in there for a while and I got worried and texted James to see if everything was ok. He said no, there are 'elevated' levels in the house and 'calling back up'. Then another truck shows up and a bunch of guys get out in all their gear/masks, ect. They go in the house and are in there forever.
Finally I'm told that it's coming from the furnace... this gas was coming through ALL of the vents in the house!! Thank God we had a second alarm in Kayla's room. The first one did start going off again about 20 min. later (we'd had the door open and it cleared out a lot of the gas in the family room), but her room would have just been filling with gas that entire time.
At like 1:00 I tell James I'm going to leave and take the kids to a hotel since they were both tired and needed to go to sleep. We got to the hotel and all tucked into bed about 2am. It was just a really, really long night.
So we've had a ton of service guys out Monday, it still isn't 'fixed' per say. There's no more gas leak, but it will happen again. Turns out Carrier had a recall on their heat exchange things (can't remember the part name), but it isn't public or on their website!! These jerks could have killed my entire family, because they aren't 'vocal' about the recall on a part of theirs! So now I have to contact them and bitch about it. *sigh*
We still had a hotel room for Monday night and are home for good now. I had to go out and get a special detector that gives you the exact read out of carbon monoxide levels in the house and plug it in where Ben sleeps.
Make sure you guys all have detectors!!! I don't know what I would have done if I had lost my daughter or any one else
I have to take Ben to the hospital
So January 1st, I find out I have a severe case of mastitis.
January 5th J has to go back to work.
Ben got really sick when I had to switch him to formula. He started to spit up and throw up, like across the room throw up. So I had to switch him to 'sensitive' formula. He was also put on Zantac for his reflux.
He still seemed to be sick. So I have to take him back in (along with Kayla since James can't get off work to help me out, stupid military). They put him on Soy formula (he's now my hippie baby) and up his Zantac.
Then he got a rash that I thought had to do with the Zantac, so I drag him and Kayla back into the doctor.
Now he's on special formula (Alimentum) that is like $30 a can.
Breastfeeding is so much easier than this...................
January 5th J has to go back to work.
Ben got really sick when I had to switch him to formula. He started to spit up and throw up, like across the room throw up. So I had to switch him to 'sensitive' formula. He was also put on Zantac for his reflux.
He still seemed to be sick. So I have to take him back in (along with Kayla since James can't get off work to help me out, stupid military). They put him on Soy formula (he's now my hippie baby) and up his Zantac.
Then he got a rash that I thought had to do with the Zantac, so I drag him and Kayla back into the doctor.
Now he's on special formula (Alimentum) that is like $30 a can.
Breastfeeding is so much easier than this...................
I have to go to the ER
One New Year's Eve I went grocery shopping and noticed my right breast started to hurt. I went home and pumped, thinking I was just engorged. It didn't help.
So then, I look up mastitis on a hunch. It said to apply mouist heat, massage the area and it should help. I did that and went to bed. That night I thought I was dieing. I was shaking cold and in pain. I finally fell asleep around 4am. I woke up at 10am and felt fine. It worked!!
At noon I started to hurt again. By 2pm I could barely take it. By 4pm (New Year's day) I said I HAVE to go to the ER. Something is wrong!!
Turns out I had mastitis. But, do you think I could have a regular staph infection? No, it had to be MRSA! So I had to take 2 antibiotics, 10 times a day, for 10 days!! I had to stop breastfeeding Benjamin immediately. :O(
That's when the problems with Ben started.
So here I am, just 2.5 weeks postpartum and James has to go back to work, I'm on tons of meds., and then Ben gets sick........ even when J is home, it's like being a single parent.
So then, I look up mastitis on a hunch. It said to apply mouist heat, massage the area and it should help. I did that and went to bed. That night I thought I was dieing. I was shaking cold and in pain. I finally fell asleep around 4am. I woke up at 10am and felt fine. It worked!!
At noon I started to hurt again. By 2pm I could barely take it. By 4pm (New Year's day) I said I HAVE to go to the ER. Something is wrong!!
Turns out I had mastitis. But, do you think I could have a regular staph infection? No, it had to be MRSA! So I had to take 2 antibiotics, 10 times a day, for 10 days!! I had to stop breastfeeding Benjamin immediately. :O(
That's when the problems with Ben started.
So here I am, just 2.5 weeks postpartum and James has to go back to work, I'm on tons of meds., and then Ben gets sick........ even when J is home, it's like being a single parent.
I have to go back to work
James was supposed to be getting his 'holiday leave' the week leading up to Christmas. Then he was going to take his 10 days paternity leave. Then he was going to take the rest of leave until my mom got here.
His work said no. They took away his holiday leave entirely and made him take his 10 days pat. leave then. Then they said he HAD to be back to work 2 weeks later, and charged him those 2 weeks of leave.
So every one else in his shop got their holiday leave. My husband had a sick baby, a sick wife, and a toddler at home and he got his leave taken away. WTF?? The military REALLY sucks some times.
So James went back to work on the 5th........ but not before me getting really sick......
His work said no. They took away his holiday leave entirely and made him take his 10 days pat. leave then. Then they said he HAD to be back to work 2 weeks later, and charged him those 2 weeks of leave.
So every one else in his shop got their holiday leave. My husband had a sick baby, a sick wife, and a toddler at home and he got his leave taken away. WTF?? The military REALLY sucks some times.
So James went back to work on the 5th........ but not before me getting really sick......
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